Yesterday I received an email from Highway Video about their newest released DVD and I was once again blown away by what they produce. Nearly four years ago a friend of mine got me hooked on Highway and I’ve been a fan ever since. They produce videos that can stand by themselves or compliment a talk or message. I’m excited to use them in the context of ministry at the schools I work at here in Ohio over the next year.
I was personally impacted by one of the new videos, on Volume 18, as I checked out their website yesterday. The title of this video is Purity and it is extremely relevant for people in the same life stage as me – a single, twenty-something that desires to be married sooner or later. Here are the words to a section of the video that really hit me.
There is a dream I have of obtaining the “perfect†relationship, that has filled my years with an idealized, selfish fantasy. It is the curse of the hopeless romantic. A choice to live in the delusion of the ideal. This of course has caused me to avoid any tangible growth. Put simply – it is the pursuit of the perfect partner. Vanity.
Those words really hit me. I’ve struggled with the vanity of this pursuit for years, because I often feel deeply convicted about the selfishness of my own heart. Like it is about me. When in reality marriage isn’t about me, but about serving my spouse as Christ served, and serves, the Church. A few years back I learned a lesson from one of the more respected men in my life, my pastor Michael Smith, about this very subject. Of course me learning this lesson was based on a bonehead mistake of mine, but praise God because I learned some valuable lessons from it. The lesson came from the book of Ephesians; here is the Scripture that really hit me.
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (Eph. 5:25, ESV)
When Michael and I talked, a few years back, about this verse, he asked me, “What does this say about relationships? Specifically marriage?†I looked at my Bible and I knew the answer, but at that stage in life I didn’t like the right answer. Michael responded with the answer as I sat there in silence, “It means that it isn’t about you, but it is about serving the woman that God entrusts to you. She is your primary ministry, your number one ministry. Nothing, besides Christ, comes before her. Not a church you may pastor or the lost you may be reaching out to. But her.†I didn’t like that, because my heart has always hurt for those who are outside of a relationship with Christ and there are so many that need to hear about Him and have their lives turned upside down by Him. I told that to Michael and he responded in a fatherly tone, “Zach then you aren’t ready for marriage.â€
The sting of those words to a hopeless romantic who longed for “her†weren’t well received, but Michael was right and I was wrong. From that day on I’ve been praying that the Lord would create this love, heart and an attitude of service for the woman, Lord-willing, He entrusts me with someday.
So go to Highway Video and check out the video Purity and be challenged, especially all you singles out there! Well, I need to get back to the prayer letter and this afternoon I am heading north to celebrate my Aunt Donna’s graduation from Ashland University with my family. Congrats Aunt Donna!
Have a radical weekend for Jesus!
Well let me know when He’s created that in you. heh, ok bad joke. I feel ya in this one Zach. I always find myself leaving the choice to Jesus, who will be the one for me (if thats His will), but than snatching it up again. But one of the biggest things that has stuck out in my mind, was something i heard from intouch.org, when Charles Stanley said in one of his messages, “God saves the best for those who wait for him.” I just love that sense of comfort and hope, that, either he will provide the mate that is a perfect match in every way, or provide something else, that will bring just as much joy. One Question, where do you find that purity video, i can get to the site, but cant find that specific one. thanks
o yea p.s. thanks for the refreshing insight that there are men out there who are still hopeless romantics.